Why You SHOULD Take Yourself Seriously! (...but Not too Seriously)

So we have all heard people say,

"I don't take myself too seriously-haha" OR "chill out, don't take life too seriously!"

....and in many ways I couldn't agree more!

Is there anything worse than that guy or gal who has one too many sticks up there to take a joke or admit to one of their own funny flaws. I think not! Life's too short to be uptight in my opinion--and that's coming straight from the mouth of a classic,  "perfectionistic Virgo" ;) 

Still, I think that it's incredibly important to take that saying with a small grain of salt as a woman, especially during the self-discovery phase that so many of us are in. When you are in high school, college, or really anytime in your twenties (actually anytime in life) , society puts a pressure on us to be "sweet" and "care-free."  Social circles during critical times like high school especially condition us women to believe that cool girls are silly, go-with-the-flow, anything goes types, and that alluring idea of acceptance is sooo strong! Having gone through high school and half of college, I've come to learn that that feeling...the allure of acceptance, is alluring at any age! That being said, unless you proactively go out of your way to take yourself and goals seriously, you'll be stuck in the high school trap of wanting to be cool & therefore not passionately driven long after you graduate! 

Still, throughout high school, I spent what felt like hours of my life frustrated with not being a "cool" girl. The cool girls were "silly," go with the flow, types--I've always been kind and non-judgmental, but throw in the independence, having a schedule and taking it seriously, and your vibe gets labeled "uptight" real fast. I personally was just born intrinsically motivated. Even if I'm not motivated by a specific goal, my mind craves focus and personal achievement of some sort--I'm an astrology nerd so imma credit that to being a Virgo.

You may be thinking: Great! Wow, that's wonderful--why are you complaining? While today I am certainly not complaining, I am pointing out that I struggled with feeling like maybe I shouldn't be so focused or driven...was I coming off too high-strung?

Ok, yes I know what you are thinking, that was high school. High school doesn't matter! But, at the time it was awful! I didn't know why being cool was equated with just doing "whatever"--it was confusing as all hell. For all you girls still in high school--that's HIGH SCHOOL. The second you leave the walls of conformity that is high school, doing "whatever" all the time in the name of being "cool" doesnt get ya far. 

But, depending on who your company is, any ounce of "no, I don't want to do that, I'd rather do this" is seen as uptight and "domineering." Social circles, family and other relationships are often times the most influential aspects on how we go about things...

So, after years of trying to understand this cool girl mentality, the pieces all fell together the moment I got to college, Outside of the walls of high school, taking your sh*t seriously is a rarity! People admire it...hell, they are ATTRACTED to it. I went from being the "up-tight," no-fun girl to the driven, motivated, "how she always so confident???" girl. That's not to say that I am always confident but you get the point.

Basically what I realized real fast was taking your personal goals, aspirations and really anything you are passionate about seriously is rare for a reason. We are underhandedly told to be sweet and understated, and that doing anything but that will make you stand out. God forbid you're seen as highly motivated because what that really translates to is a THREAT to other women and guys who you "don't want to scare away." Yet the only way goals get accomplished is via taking them seriously---take yourself seriously girl!! Being the confident woman will make you stand out. Think of any of your idols? I bettcha they wouldn't be where they are today if they didn't stand out. If they didn't take their goals seriously. Right?! 

 

Anywho, as someone who has been dedicated to the health and wellness lifestyle through the most judgmental times we experience as humans (hi there high school!), I can say that it's no secret as to why or how I stay lean all year or eat clean consistently, or get to my early morning workouts day after day...I take it seriously! It's important to me...!

That being said, social situations often make us feel like we have to just forget about our personal preferences and goals for the sake of not drawing attention to yourself.

Scenario: Friends wanna split an order of nachos? Well, I personally don't eat greasy foods--I no longer get satisfaction (again, this for ME is not restriction from fun, I just don't enjoy the feeling greasy foods give me--I'm too hooked on the feeling I get from a clean diet) therefore I don't split it with them. I say "Oh you go ahead! Omg, seriously get whatever you want but i'm just not a big nacho lover." Notice taking my lifestyle seriously wasn't me saying, "ummmm I don't eat nachos *eye roll"--Doing yo thang and sticking to it doesn't equate to being b*tchy!! I

On the contrary, "Cool girl, go-with-the-flow"  expectations would say, "Omg just eat the fries to make your friend feel comfortable about ordering some." But, from my experience, goals don't get achieved if you never take your goals seriously and are always bending for other people! Now again, this is a personal example and I'm not telling you you can't eat nachos with your friends --this is just an example--YOU do YOU! But you can apply this to any situation where an external factor pressures you to deviate from what's important to you. You can take yourself seriously without being an up-tight person! 

Goals and drive don't equate to uptightness...being a b*tch does. 

So in the case of being consistent with my lifestyle of balance and fitness, I know that I wouldn't be able to maintain it the way I do if I didn't take it seriously...but not too seriously ;) Use your own judgement but long story short, girl, if you got goals to a achieve, don't give into the societal pressure to just go with any and everything, for the sake of being "sweet"... you gotta hold yourself accountable and get serious about your goals--you owe it to yourself! 

 

--Morning Dove