Skin & Mental Health Glow-Up.

Hey girl—I’m talking skin today & just be ready to sit down, especially if you are wearing heels 👠. 

So many of you who follow me on Instagram have been DMing me about my skin. Specifically in regards to what the heck happened to make it break out last year &  how I got my smooth, glow back over the past couple months. 

This is my skin at its worst. It was red all over with a combination of pimples, small cysts & Whitehead’s.  

This is my skin at its worst. It was red all over with a combination of pimples, small cysts & Whitehead’s.  

If you are a real OG follower, you know that I was blessed with glass-like skin all through high school and into my second year of college,  {which I was not grateful enough for at the time!!} until last year when all hell broke loose on my face.  It started with this odd texture issue where my face looked like it was covered in sand paper, which then progressed to this state on the right—inflamed & red. 

What caused it?  

My skin situation was multifactorial {hormones mostly, but also stress}, nonetheless it took an incredible toll on my self esteem for months last year. So much so that I basically disappeared for a few months from social media out of embarrassment—I was taken completely off guard by my skin and felt out of control in a way that I have never experienced. Even during my eating disorder, chronic illness or other battles. 

Needless to say, I tirelessly searched for a solution.  

Creams, acne systems, diet changes, lifestyle alterations, YOU NAME IT! But, nada. I was doing all the right things>>hadn’t had dairy in years, no processed foods, eating all the greens....Still nothing changed for months. In fact, it seemed to get worse and worse.   

I knew something had to change drastically for the sake of my mental health. I no longer felt like myself & that stab at identity impacted what I felt capable of doing on a daily basis.  

The Reveal.

Are you ready for the big magical reveal? No, it’s not a special green juice. Not a special all natural face wash. Nothing natural or holistic in the slightest.   

 

Your favorite, holistic all naturál, anti-medication, LA girl went on the strongest acne medication on the market.  

Accutane.    

Yes, you read that correct. Read it again if you have to. I went on {and am still on} the controversial drug accutane & despite it going against everything I believe in, it was the best decision I made for myself—ever. 

{That being said, I also started a whole new skincare routine simultaneously with Fre Skincare which I believe is what’s helping to heal my scars so rapidly.}

 

Now I am sure you have a bunch of questions like:  

  • How on earth I thought it was ok to take this drug.
  • If it’s safe.  
  • What my experience has been.  
  • Why I am being so extreme with my treatment. 
  • And more I’m sure...

 

I will answer all of those questions in another blog post, but for now I want to focus on the reason I am revealing this voice to you in the first place: 

 Identity Crisis.

Something I learned in 2018 is that having a flexible mindset...some simply call it having an open mind—will be a game changer in any & every aspect of your life. 

Without even giving all the details, you can deduce that this decision to go on such a strong medication was conflicting with my identity as someone who believes natural is almost always the best way to go. 

A confliction with in one’s identity—That’s a powerful confliction. As humans, we like to hold onto and remain consistent in our identity. Therefore putting aside my holistic natural ideals in the name of my mental health was incredibly difficult. 

More Than a Skin Glow-Up.

But basically, after making the tough decision to go against the identity I built {remember that identity is completely self-constructed} I feel more secure in my identity than ever before. Not because I chose to go with something that conflicts with my identity per se, but because in doing so I learned {again} that there is immense power that comes with the ability to know who you are at a core level & make decisions based off more than ego alone. 

 

I am humbled by this experience & contact with Western medicine, and whether or not you can relate to my skin issue, I hope you can relate to the idea of conflicts with identity & the struggle between upholding one’s identity and just living your life. 

 

We have all been there—right? Especially for those of us still in our adolescence or 20s. You know you have if you have ever been in a position that challenges personal ideals. If you have ever wanted to do, try or say something but felt it didn’t align with who you see yourself as—that’s an identity thing. 

 

My skin 3 months into accutane—still have 3 months to go 🤗. 

My skin 3 months into accutane—still have 3 months to go 🤗. 

The idea of identiy is powerful and being able to work with it with humilty in my case rendered a positive outcome—healthy, radiant skin but more importantly, better mental health & confidence. 

 

Thanks for reading as always queens 👸🏽 

Have any questions? Can you relate? Have you been in a similar situation & felt conflicted on what to do? Leave a comment and let’s talk 🤗